Wednesday, July 29, 2020

Thankful

I don't know where to start except to say that I decided last night that today was my opportunity to get this done. I researched Florida law and changing the locks is illegal under these circumstances as is withholding my belongings as is threatening me. I also ascertained definitively that I could use any reasonable means to gain entry into my residence.

When the movers arrived at 8 AM - I waited around the corner until their arrival, I rang the bell and knocked at the door and he would not let us in. I called 911 and two officers arrived who were very sensitive to the situation. They attempted to speak with him to no avail. To make a long story short, 5' 3" Beth in her dress kicked in the double French doors and invited the two officers into my residence. He tried to deny them entry and I explained to GG that I lived in the house and had invited them in. Speechless!

GG was shocked. He accused me of breaking and entering and they explained that what I did was 100% legal. And they told him that children have better behavior. A third officer arrived and read him the riot act as well. The movers were able to complete everything.

The police yesterday empowered his nonsense. They let him be in charge because they were pro male, insensitive macho men. The officers today did not enable him and it was very different. I am not suggesting this approach for anyone else but me. Protective orders IMHO are not worth anything and just serve to enrage already angry men. And the justice system in this country is not a panacea. I assessed the situation and with the presence of police officers, I had confidence in a good outcome. He is basically a bully. And sometimes you have to stand up to bullies.

I feel good that I did, but please don't use me as example and get hurt. I have been walking on eggshells for a long time with this narcissistic bully and I am a lawyer. I was married to a lawyer for 35 years. I "discussed" the law with the officers on evictions, changing of locks, theft of property, extortion, and threats of violence. A refresher course never does any harm. I was in the presence of the police and/or movers at all times today.

 I am in my gold leaf pagoda bed all beautifully made - as exhausted as I am, I wanted just my bed perfect tonight. I am sipping a lovely glass of Champagne, cuddling with the pups, and very thankful for all of it. I am on high alert though, trust me.

Hopefully now we can start doing some interior design posts. Such as, my reviews of Simplisafe and my new cordless Dyson. The handyman is here next week installing all the new lighting and the bathroom sinks and faucets. The countertops are gorgeous - pictures soon.

A new dawn, a new day, hopefully a new and happy life.




113 comments:

  1. Good night and sweet dreams ninja woman!

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    1. Yes, good night and sweet dreams ninja woman! I had every expectation that your name was on the deed to that house, together with every vested right and protection therein. With so much admiration and affection to you, your fan in North Florida.

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    2. Karma will take care of him.

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    3. Thank you all - in truth, these double French doors are the most vulnerable. And karma is a bitch.

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  2. I am so glad you are safe and happy! SIP on my sweet brave woman!

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  3. Oh Beth, I have been so worried about you. This is a big win, and the start of a new chapter in your life. What drama!

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    1. He loves the drama - feeds on it. Thanks for your support.

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  4. Well done, and congratulations!

    Glad you and the pups are finally safe and sound in your pretty new home. This truly is the first day of the rest of your life.

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  5. I am so proud of you. You knew the law and stood up for your rights. You took the situation into your own hands, educated the police and, best of all, kicked that door in. Bully be damned! Enjoy that well deserved bubbly and, especially, your independence. Can’t wait for what’s in store on the blog and in your life!

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    1. Thank you my friend - my late husband and I loved Boca - we used to attend the Futures Industry Association Conference at the Hotel and Beach Club every year.

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  6. So happy for your outcome and hopefully those days are behind you. Wishing you all the joy in your new home.

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  7. Wow.... good for u and so glad u r safe.

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  8. OK, you forgot to mention you had super powers and could kick in doors!!

    Seriously PROUD of you. I think you scared him, LOL. Proceed with caution. Don't mean to be negative. I guess I'm still paranoid after watching Dirty John. Never under estimate the power of EVIL.
    I can't wait to see what you do to your beautiful new home, I absolutely love it.

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    1. They were French doors, but I still get credit. LOL I'm being VERY cautious. Thank you.

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  9. Was very concerned for you. Am very impressed too, that you empowered YOU and prevailed. And yes, continue to be “on high alert” for any further contact. And, welcome home.

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  10. Woohoo!!! Keep calm and carry on!!Congratulations!Denise

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  11. I am so glad you are safe and have your belongings. You were in my thoughts all day yesterday. I would send a Letter to the Editor with a copy to the Police Chief highlighting the Jekyll and Hyde behavior of the police force. The community needs to be aware as other citizens don't have the skills you have in navigating such dangerous situations.

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    1. Yes,I agree. It was incredible the contrast between the two incidents and the police involved.

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  12. Sisters are doing it for themselves! Good job!

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  13. Yes! Great job in taking control of the situation! I never imagined a front kick would do the job though!😃So happy for you and the pups. The future is bright, enjoy!
    One of your Florida peeps,
    Michelle

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    1. Thanks - double French doors are very vulnerable in fact.

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  14. Please install a security system with cameras asap!

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  15. Nothing like being in control of your own life, the situation, and owning your power. Women have to stand up to these bullies. You are awesome!
    Wishing you a wonderful, sunny, happy day feathering your new nest.

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    1. This is so true - it furthers emboldens bullies when you play the victim - most of them are cowards in fact. A friend said these same words to me - take back your power.

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  16. Wonder Woman to the rescue! May the rest of your days be peaceful.

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  17. Just as you took control of finding your beautiful home.., you took control of your future. Never under estimate your gifts.
    Wishing you peace and happiness!

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  18. I don't know you, but we would be friends if I did ;-). I am excited for you new beginnings. You kicked *ss yesterday - You figured it out and you did it. Very excited for your next chapter, and hopeful that the rest of the move is smooth sailing.

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  19. Hey Beth, So happy you are safe and sound! I agree- install a security system! Enjoy your new home! xo Mary Anne

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  20. Wow! You go!! I may have missed something but do you own the house he is residing in? And how can he extort you for $$$ if you aren’t married to him? Good riddance in getting rid of that POS!!

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    1. Because he lives in his own version of reality basically.

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  21. I am so happy to hear that everything turned out well. I was so worried after I read your post. I wanted to come and help you. Glad that the police who came to help were the "right" ones!

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    1. Yes, everything has been changed. We backed out of our house deal in Michigan because the house inspection found a multitude of major problems.

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  22. Marked SAFE! Very happy to hear that this is over. Please stay safe!

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  23. I am relieved and happy that everything went well for you!

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  24. You go girl!! I am so relieved to hear you are safe and cozy in your happy new home. Enjoy the peace and comfort that it brings you. I look forward to seeing future posts with pictures of the transformation. Stay safe and enjoy your freedom!
    Paige

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    1. Thanks - I am trying to get there - still very stressed out.

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  25. Amazing...you're just an amazing woman! I am so happy you had the help you needed yesterday and are now safely tucked in your beautiful new house. It'll take time to sort through and process these last stressful weeks, so give yourself a lot of credit and time to heal. Feathering your beautiful new nest will be all the sweeter with your supportive friends and new neighbors. Cheers!

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  26. GOOD FOR YOU!! So happy to hear that it’s over, you’re in your home with your pups, and safe!! Here’s to your fresh start and fabulous new adventures!! You should be very proud of what you did!!

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    1. I am. I am not going to be the victim in this story.

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  27. 🙏🙏🙏

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  28. Good on you, girl. YOU RULE!
    I am so glad you are safe, have your fur babies safe with you and are in your new home and at the start of a new, better life.
    Please, please, get a good-make that great- security system , and be very careful at all times. I know that having to look over your shoulder is trying, but it won't last forever. This man sounds dangerous but basically dumb to me, and sooner or later he will be cooling his heels (and sorry ass) where he belongs-jail.
    Til that happy day arrives, live your best life, make new memories in your new home, where you have only yourself to please, and know that many, many people care and have been very worried about your safety.
    Sending hugs from Oregon

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    1. What a lovely comment and so much appreciated.

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  29. Relieved this morning to read that all is well for you. I guess you showed him! ;) GG now has to try to explain to his neighbors, golf pals, etc just why the police were at his house and why the door was kicked in. Shame on him. Karma will follow. If you have an iPhone, be sure that the "Find My Friends" will not reveal your location on his phone. No stalking! Many gated neighborhoods in Florida are manned by security guards, not sure if yours is. If so, give them a pic of GG and instruct them to never allow him to enter as a driver or a passenger. And now, onward to creating a happy life and comfortable home as you define it!

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    1. I have already done all of this - thank you. And yes, we have excellent security guards. They have all the info.

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  30. You go, girl! So happy for you!

    slf

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  31. YOU GO GIRL! Another vote here for the security system and cameras. (Be sure they are high-def cameras). You might even contemplate getting a large dog - a German Shepherd, maybe. One that could be a formidable protector, if need be. I don't know how that would work with your two doggies, though. At the risk of sounding as if I were meddling, I would reconsider the restraining order. Then at least if he comes around and attempts to bother you, you can have him removed from your presence.

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    1. The security system and cameras are done. The large dog and restraining order are not going to happen. But I have other plans I am implementing. Thanks.

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  32. Yes, it IS a new day! So happy to hear you’re safe and things went your way. Of course, it’s only because you took the reigns and persevered. You deserve every drop of that champagne!

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    1. Thanks and I am happy that I took charge instead of being further victimized.

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  33. Yay Beth! Good Job! Standing up to a Bully (safely) is the only way out of domestic hell I think. You did all the right things. So glad you got appropriate help from the police and empowered yourself through your knowledge & training in the law (that and karate kicks lol!). So pleased for you that you are Free at Last! I remember that utter joy & relief to no longer be subject to a crazy man. Your life is forever your own again now. Can’t wait to see your lovely new home evolve!

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  34. I have always wanted to kick down a door! Way to go! I am married to a bully who happens to be a lawyer and he has done same stuff. I myself am a lawyer and know my rights but I also know how it feels to have someone acting like your former whatever and how physical threats hit a sensitive spot in someone who doesn't think in those terms. Good luck to you; you've crossed a huge river. Have zero contact( you know all this) and his power to make you fearful will diminish over time. Hopefully, he will just go away at some point, more do than the ones who make you their life's project. Sending you the best of wishes for a happy life absent drama.

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    1. Yes, you understand this too well. Thank you.

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  35. Praise God for being a kick-ass woman. Who knew those two thoughts could be combined in one sentence? Now drop kick the bad memories into the lake and live your life.

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  36. Good heavens! I am so glad you are out of that house. I do hope you haves a good security system. You should probably buy and gun and learn to use it if you haven't already. I thought about you all day yesterday and went to sleep concerned about you. I was married to an abuser a long time ago, and he was always threatening to kill me and our son. You never mentioned the age of GG, but is it possible he is getting dementia? I had wondered if he had any family who could come and deal with him.

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    1. He is estranged from almost his entire family. No wonder.

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  37. Enjoy your well-earned peaceful new life.

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  38. Hallelujah! So, so happy you got the help you needed from the police and used your inner ninja to show him who’s boss. Enjoy every minute of putting your beautiful house together, I know it’s going to be spectacular. But please, be very careful, GG sounds dangerous, so don’t let your guard down at least for awhile. Wishing you great joy in your new abode.

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    1. Thank you and I have a very safe plan in place.

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  39. Thank God you are safe! I hope you have seen the end of him.

    Send him a check for the broken door and write Payment In Full!

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  40. Yesterday, I was literally shaking with fear for your outcome. Today, it's time to add 'One Badass Woman' to your resume. Well played and stay safe!

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  41. Thank goodness you are safe and well - and your pups as well! Whew, we were all so worried and it is so nice of you, even in your exhaustion, to update your readers on the situation You are amazing!
    Here's to a new beginning in your beautiful new home!

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    1. Thanks. I felt like the least I could do was let everyone know I am safe.

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  42. So happy for you! Glad to hear things went your way. But, standing up to a bully was the right thing to do They believe they can do anything to anyone and win, but in reality, they're cowards. They'll run away from people who defend themselves. Make sure you don't let your guard down..

    Good luck in your beautiful new home! Looking forward to reading more about decorating it and settling in.

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    1. All very true. I will be careful and thank you.

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  43. It was good to read that the move went as well given the circumstances. Enjoy your new home and look ahead.

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  44. Although I don't know you, I have followed your journey and I can't tell you how very satisfying your outcome today was for me to read!! Congratulations!

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  45. I so admire your bravery and strength. I also agree with your assessment of the legal system. I wish you the very best in your new home.

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    1. Thanks. Women need to empower themselves I think.

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  46. I was going to write an open letter to GG to call him on his obnoxious behavior (my grandfather would have called him a rude ruffian) but decided you'd like this amusing story more. I was checking out of Crystal City HG sometime ago buying something Asian looking. The young woman proudly told me she knew what it was because a lady had told her about "Shana osi reed", I asked her to repeat it and got the same pronunciation. Well, my brain was in neutral that morning and I just smiled & went to the car. The light bulb finally went off and I realized she was proudly trying to say Chinoiserie. I smiled and thought "I wonder if Beth was here?" Thank you for being a wonderful teacher ;-)

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    1. This made my day. Actually, several people over the years have recognized me in stores including HG and have introduced themselves. Funny.

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  47. Onward and upward !!!

    Its all about Girl Power!!

    So glad you are safe.

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  48. Beth, you might like these napkins for your new place: https://www.casparionline.com/products/potted-palms-paper-dinner-napkins-in-coral-20-per-package

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  49. Yay Beth! So glad you are safe and in your wonderful home with your pups. Looking forward to your next chapter!

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  50. So glad you are safe and enjoying the new house!!!

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  51. I’m late to the party on all of this, but can’t believe what you’ve been through! SO glad you are safe and in your beautiful new home! There’s a novel in this, I think!

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    1. The crazy part is that I have not posted 90% of it. Thank you though.

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  52. So glad you and your pups are safe!

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